Madame de Winton’s Turkish Bloom of Health

I love Victorian advertisements. They are so different from  what we read today. They have more words, more elegance, and more style. They  are less strident than our own – and more entertaining as a result. Here are  two fantastic examples from The Cambrian newspaper from 1865.
When I read that Madame  de Winton’s Turkish Bloom of Health will make me Beautiful For Ever I was determined to track it down. I need it.  Just look at my photo. It is apparently a  delightful and harmless preparation which is so good that I will try it  once and use it forever. Just try to stop me, is what I say. It removes wrinkles, freckles, pimples and all  unsightly eruptions of the skin. Since I have all of them in varying  degrees, they should rush me some immediately.
I mean, I know it is obviously designed to impart to the female face the bloom of youthful and  healthy beauty but I am sure it won’t do me any harm. After all, it is  recommended by female aristocracy and  gentry everywhere, especially since it does not have a single deleterious particle in its composition, unlike the many vile and dangerous compounds daily  offered to the public.
I was pleased to learn that it is sold in packets of various  sizes but if I send just 32 postage stamps to Madame de Winton at 62 Hadley  Street South in London she will kindly send me a sample.
But here is more. She is looking for agents in every town.  How much better can it get? Not only a life transformed but a career  opportunity too!
But here are other opportunities. I am especially drawn  towards Kernick’s Vegetable Pills,  for reasons which it might be best to shelter behind a discreet veil. These  wonderful little things are without a  particle of mercury, antimony or other material ingredients which is always  a good sign I find. When I have taken them I will apparently require no confinement indoors and I will be  cured of headaches, bilious complaints  and all disorders of the head and stomach. And it is at this point that the  reader begins to form an idea of the intentions of this fine product. According  to Dr Balbernie, they are the best pills for ordinary constipated habits. It all becomes clear, doesn’t it?  Another correspondent, Richard Rees, claims to have taken one box of pills and found instant relief and when the second box was consumed was entirely  cured. Good news indeed I am sure you will agree, but I am inclined to  think that the quantity of medication suggests a particularly extreme problem. And  if they were as effective and as quick as he claimed, then one hopes that  perhaps some precautionary confinement indoors was sensibly employed

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